The honorees are unveiled at the induction ceremony. Shirley Kauhaihao stands at far right next to the photo of her husband, 1st Lt. John Kauhaihao. - Photo: Lisa Asato

By Lisa Asato / Ka Wai Ola Loa

When 1st Lt. John Kauhaihao was inducted into the Gallery of Heroes at the U.S. Army Museum of Hawai'i recently, his widow brought along the last letter he wrote to her from Vietnam. It was dated Aug. 25, 1969, and had arrived in Hawai'i on "the fifth of September, the day he died," recalled Shirley Kauhaihao, who was his classmate and sweetheart at Konawaena High (Hawai'i) and the mother of his four children.

"One thing he said in his last letter, he let me know the area they were in, they called it 'hot,' " Shirley said in an interview after the April 30 induction ceremony at Fort DeRussy, Waikīkī, O'ahu. "Things were not good there, lot of action, and if he didn't make it home be sure that the kids got what they needed… and for me, just know that I love you, that was the closing."

Kauhaihao, a citizen soldier with the Hawai'i Army National Guard, was honored along with six other Distinguished Service Cross recipients inducted into the Gallery of Heroes in a ceremony on the lawn fronting the museum. "The heroic actions of these soldiers from World War II, Korea and Vietnam are now decades old, but today is a clear validation that they will never be forgotten today and forever on these walls of this museum," Maj. Gen. Raymond Mason, commanding general of the 8th Theater Sustainment Command, told the gathering.

"These heroes tasted the bitter waters of war and sacrificed everything for their fellow soldiers, their unit, their families that are gathered here. Their country and they carry this spirit of Hawaiian warriors in their hearts," he added.

Among the audience were about 30 friends and family of Kauhaihao, who together comprised approximately a quarter of the attendees.

"It's been an incredible 40-year journey," Shirley said after the ceremony, as various well-wishers came to pay their respects to her husband's memory four decades after his death. "It feels really good. He was an exceptional person not just to us, but also to the men that he served with. Not knowing him really as a soldier in battle, to have these men come and tell me about him, it's been just astounding, wonderful."

Four of those men flew in from Virginia, Utah, Guam and Hawai'i Island for the ceremony.

Army Drill Sgt. Ben Waiolama, 74, and his wife, Laura, who live in Honolulu, O'ahu, made sure to attend the ceremony after reading about Kauhaihao's induction in the newspaper. In 1960, Waiolama led Kauhaihao's basic training and the two were in Vietnam at the same time but served in different units. Describing Kauhaihao as a "good soldier," Waiolama said he was "so proud" to meet Shirley.

"When I heard that (he was killed) it was devastating for me," Waiolama said, adding that his act of bravery was right in line with the kind of person he was. "He had heart. He had ambition. But he cared for his soldiers. Unfortunately, he got killed. I spent three tours in Vietnam. I came back a wounded warrior, but at least I survived."

Ben Waiolama, who was 1st Lt. John Kauhaihao's drill sergeant during basic training, said he was "so proud" to meet Kauhaihao's wife, Shirley, at center. Waiolama's wife Laura is at right.

Shareen Turner, Kauhaihao's eldest child, was 9 when her father was killed. She flew to Honolulu for the ceremony from Hilo, Hawai'i with her husband, Darryl, daughter, Dawn, her husband, Lyndon, and two grandchildren, Kyla and Dodge.

"It's wonderful," she said. "We always knew he was a hero. We grew up with his medals and those things."

Now in her 40s, Turner said she still vividly remembers the day the military car pulled up in their driveway to tell her family that her father had died in Vietnam. But the past year has been a growing and healing experience now that the family has met some of the men with whom her father served, including E. Tayloe Wise, who included Kauhaihao, under a pseudonym, in his book "Eleven Bravo: A Skytrooper's Memoir of War in Vietnam."

"In that short time he got to be with my dad in Vietnam it made such an impression on him that he put my dad in his memoirs," Turner said, adding that she can now learn from conversations with his friends about what Vietnam was really like.

"I read the military papers and all of those things growing up… but there was never talk about what went on in Vietnam," she said. Turner is especially fond of Wise's book, which she says allows her to "get to know where my dad was … (and) what he was going through." Wise, who lives in Virginia, attended the ceremony.

Five of the seven honorees were from the Vietnam War. Shirley said their induction resonates with Vietnam veterans. "They get recognition through their fellow men who are being recognized, so in away it reflects on the surviving soldiers," she said, adding that it helps the healing from a war that spurred protests and which saw returning soldiers maligned and spat on.

Shirley, who was 27 when her husband left for Vietnam, said her message to those who have loved ones serving in Iraq and Afghanistan, is to: "Just support their man. Be there for them no mater what condition they come home in because they're going to need their support. And war is hell."

Turner, her daughter, said the experience of meeting and befriending her father's fellow soldiers has been so positive that the Kauhaihaos consider those soldiers part of their 'ohana. "It's been really good," she said. "So we've got a bigger extended family – even though it's already as big as it is."